Indoor, Outdoor & Kids' Trampolines

Why I Don’t Have Kids: Freezer Is the New Playground


Of course, I love kids also. I just don’t want any of my own. And I’m going to show
you why in a segment I call, “Why I Don’t Have Kids.” All right, this is from
Allie from Aurora, Colorado. This is what happens when you
leave a three-year-old alone with a litter box. [GROANING] OK. [LAUGHTER] Allie, were you really
surprised that that happened? What do you expect? I’m going to leave my son
with this tiny sandbox. And I’m sure everything
will be fine. You know, all I know is a
cat would never do that. And that’s why I have
cats and not a kid. [LAUGHTER] Oh. [APPLAUSE] Ashley from
Rosemount, Minnesota– I heard my daughter
screaming my name, so I went to see
what was happening. This is where her
dad had put her. [LAUGHTER] Let me remind you, the
name of the segment is, “Why I Don’t
Have Kids,” not, “Why You Shouldn’t Have Kids.” [LAUGHTER] I mean, come on. I don’t know a lot about kids. But I know if you’re going
to put them in a freezer, put some pants on them. It’s cold. [LAUGHTER] It’s chilly in there. Brianna from Ocean
Springs, Mississippi– I’m a wedding photographer,
so I don’t usually take photos of my kids. When I do, it always ends
up looking like this. [LAUGHTER] Yeah. [APPLAUSE] Wow. But, I mean, really. [INAUDIBLE] Right? [APPLAUSE] I mean, that’s amazing. Look at that milk. You’ve taken something
terrible, like children, and made it beautiful. [LAUGHTER] [CHUCKLING] Stacy from Southgate,
Michigan– here’s my daughter Michaela enjoying
some chocolate pudding. [LAUGHTER] You know, I don’t know if I
would use the word “enjoying.” [LAUGHTER] Yeah. That’s the same look I get
after enjoying some tequila. [LAUGHTER] [CHUCKLING] [CHEERING] [APPLAUSE] Thanks for sending those in. If your kids do
something you think I should see, please
send it to me.

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