Today we lay the smack down. Let’s talk about that. ( music playing ) Good mythical morning. And good mythical luck
getting through today’s episode without a few bumps and bruises
because today we are getting
buck wild. And I’m not just talking about
the wild foraging for Rice
Krispies made of insect poop – that we’ll be eating later on.
– ( grunts ) I’m also talking about getting
wild in the ring for
WrestleMania. That’s right, it’s time for… Okay, what we’re going to do
is conduct a test to see
who can perform the most accurate wrestling
moves based only on
verbal instructions. And normally,
we would be competing. – Right, yeah.
– But honestly, there’s too much
risk involved with our aging bodies,
so we have asked two friends
of ours, experts in the field,
if you will, to come in
and compete in our place. They’re going to listen
to Stevie’s instructions
and each attempt the move. Then Rhett and I will sit here
in the comfort of the desk and give a score of one to ten
based on how close they got
to the actual wrestling move. Whoever has the most points
will win the first ever GMM Wrestling Federation
championship belt. ( yelling ) – Hey, I’m Randy.
– And I’m Dandy. both: We’re the Mandy brothers.
Randy and Dandy Mandy. Those numbnuts Rhett and Link
asked us to do some
wrestling moves. That’s right. We’re gonna
execute these wrestling moves
in pristine perfection ’cause we’re not a pile
of wet wusses. – Let’s do this!
– Right! This is my training partner,
Dirty Paul. This is my sparring partner,
Floppy Fred. He gets me drinks
and he pops the zits
on my back before a match. Stevie:
This first move is called
The Widow’s Peak. Never heard of it. Facing your opponent,
take his head and put it
between your legs. Flip your opponent into the air
and put him on your shoulder. Clasp both hands around your
opponent’s face. Fall onto your butt driving the
back of your opponent’s skull
into your shoulder. As your butt hits the ground,
release your grasp
on your opponent. – That’s a mouthful.
– You’re going up, Paul. – You first?
– Yeah! Here we go.
( grunting ) Okay, this is the part
I know you like. Ooh. I heard that. You okay? And then we’re done. All right. Get down. Whoop! ( grunts ) ( vocalizing ) Yeah! Couldn’t have
done it without ya. Whoo! Boo-ya. Nice work, Randy and Dandy. All right, let’s see
what Randy did. Link: Oh, my.
There it is. Going up. Oh, very limber. Not Randy, but the other guy. Rhett:
Very intimate between Randy
and Dirty Paul. – Link: Oh, wow.
– Rhett: Yeah, yeah, that was– Link:
Who was doing the move on who? Rhett: And then look at that.
And then you see it continues. Link: Oh, wow.
Rhett: And then there’s– yeah. There’s a little spread eagle
thing that happens there. It’s got a theatrical element,
which is nice. Well, let’s see if Mandy
did any better. – Link: Dandy.
– Rhett: Dandy. – Let’s see if Dandy–
whatever the guy’s name is.
– Link: Mandy’s the last name. Oh, there it is.
Oh, went way over the shoulder.
Boom. – Rhett: Oh, wow, that’s–
– Link: Yeah, very quick. All right, now let’s watch
former WWE superstar, Victoria, show us how
it’s actually done. – Oh, my. There it is.
– Rhett: Oh, oh. What? Oh, gosh. – Whoa!
– Yeah! – Rhett: I’ll judge Dandy.
How about that?
– Link: Okay. All right. Rhett: That seems fair. You know, Dandy did do
a similar move. I think that I’m gonna go
with– I’m gonna give this
an eight. – I’m pretty impressed
– Link: Out of eight. – Rhett: An eight out of ten.
– Link: Okay. And then Randy, the opponent
was sitting on the shoulder and didn’t go over the back
and then– oh, gosh. Nobody wins
when Randy does that. I’m gonna give that
a three out of ten. Wow, that seems
generous to me. All right, let’s move on. Stevie: This next move is called
Sister Abigail. – We’ll get some nuns involved.
– Yep. Facing your opponent,
grab his right arm
with your left – and pull it around
– Okay. Pull him towards you
and hook your left arm
around his neck. – Now drape your opponent
across your right knee.
– Okay. Kiss your opponent
on the forehead. – Spin your opponent–
– Is the kiss necessary? That’s not– that doesn’t jive
with my brand. Spin your opponent driving him
face first into the mat – while you land flat
on your back.
– Okay. All right, Dandy,
show me what you’ve got. ( grunting ) Oh! That hurt me more
than it hurt the dummy. ( coughing ) – You okay, Dandy?
– I’m ready. Your turn. Grab you, pull you close. Is it lips or forehead? I’ll do both just in case. ( grunting ) Ooh! Ooh! Pay no– pay no attention to the man without a wig. – Hey, man.
– Don’t look over here! – Don’t break character.
– Don’t look over here, man! – What are you doing?
– Nothing. Just got a quick
haircut and it grew back. Okay, now let’s get a replay
of how Dandy did. Getting ready.
Getting re– takes a moment. You gotta– you gotta grab
a guy to have– oh. – Rhett: Coax him into
– Link: A little kiss. – Rhett: On the forehead. Whoa.
– both: Oh! Rhett: I think Dandy’s got
a hole on his crotch. Dandy looked very stunned
at the end of that. Let’s see what Randy did. Link: Facing off in
a similar fashion. Looks like they’re about
to dance. Yeah. – Rhett: There you go.
– Link: So far it’s the same. – Kiss, still the same.
– Rhett: Yeah, he did the kiss
on the forehead and the mouth. – Link: Two kisses.
– Rhett: Uh-huh. Double kiss. – Link: Ooh!
– Rhett: Well, he’s got a hole
in his crotch too. We gotta see the real thing.
This is the Sister Abigail
as it’s supposed to be performed by Bray Wyatt. Okay. Ooh, okay.
We’re in the same place now. Link: Where’s the kiss?
Let’s see that kiss. – Yep, there it is. Ooh.
– Rhett: It’s a toss. – You throw backwards.
– You throw backwards. You throw backwards.
Let me judge Randy first. Now, see, now Randy does
the drape, he does the kiss, nailing it so far.
Second kiss for added measure
is nothing to be ashamed of. – Rhett: Nothing.
– Link: And, see, this is
the point of contention here, is the opponent
landing on his face? – Rhett: Yes. Yes. Yes.
– Link: Yes. You know, you didn’t land
in the right way, but, I don’t know, I’m saying that’s a good seven… Rhett:
Whoa, okay. …out of ten. I mean, that’s pretty good going blind in there, Randy. Don’t call me Randy. – I’m talking to Randy.
– Oh, Randy, yeah. Now, Dandy did
some interesting things, but the picking up from
the back and tossing over, while it’s a cool
wrestling move, it’s not really what–
it’s not really what happened ’cause it makes
the falling down completely inconsequential, so I’m gonna have to
give that a five. Link:
Yeah, I have to agree. And he, evidentially,
has stunned himself. Yeah. Stevie:
This move is called
the Blue Thunder Bomb – Ooh, yeah.
– Never heard of it. Facing your opponent’s back, drape his inside arm
over the back of your head. Grab your opponent under
his inside hamstring and, as you begin to spin, lift him into the air
as high as you can in a cradling position. Spin a full 180 degrees, keeping your head between
your opponent’s legs. Drop your opponent onto
his back between your legs and land with at least one leg
over his outstretched arm to apply a proper
pinning predicament. Predicament. This is quite
a predicament. Why don’t you go first. Okay, here we go, Paul. Don’t hold back, Randy. ( grunting ) Whoa! Whoa, I’m seeing it! – I’m seeing it!
– Avert your eyes, Dandy! – I’m seeing it!
– Avert your eyes! I’m seeing it! Okay. I’m looking away,
I don’t wanna cheat. I think we nailed it. Whoo! Ooh-hoo! Pick him up, throw him over my shoulder, grab the back
of the hamstring. ( grunts ) Whoo! ( grunts ) Oh, no! Yeah! Yeah! Whoo! Pinning predicament
engaged. Okay. Let’s see how Randy
did this one. Link: Blue Thunderbomb.
Kick– ooh! Rhett:
Yeah, spin-a-roonie. Link: Oh, getting
a little curtain action. Rhett: Yeah, nothing to be
ashamed of there either. – Link: Okay.
– Rhett: Okay. Link:
Wow, this is going on forever. When is this gonna end? Rhett:
Soon, I believe. Link:
And… oh– whoops. Rhett:
Oh, whoa, and the finger point. – What did Dandy do?
– Let’s see Dandy. Link:
Okay, dragging him up, throwing him over, okay. Oh, tickling the thigh. Bring– ooh,
bringing him back. Rhett:
Okay, he’s spinning. ( both exclaim ) Link:
Oh, what? He shook his hair off
for a second. – Yeah.
– That was quite
an impactful ending. Yeah, it’s kinda surprising to
learn that the hair is not real. Oh, it’s real it just
has an extension cord. Rhett:
It’s kinda cool how
it looks there for a second. Let’s see how
the real thing is done. This is the Blue Thunderbomb
done by Sami Zayn. – Oh. Whoa!
– Whoa! Oh, man,
they’re so much better. Link: Did you see that?
Oh, my goodness. It’s like a ride
at the state fair that you don’t survive. Rhett:
Now, what I’ll say about Dandy is that Dandy actually
puts him up onto his shoulder
in the proper way. Link:
He’s even landing on him
in a similar way. I mean, I don’t have
any skin in this game, but I think he’s doing
pretty great. Rhett:
It looks like you’re supposed
to land at the same time and Dandy kinda just
added insult to injury – by landing on him later.
– Link: Yeah, double leg drop. Rhett: So I’m gonna deduct
a couple of points, but I think this is
another solid eight. – ( bell dings )
– Link: Oh, wow, but Randy, on the other hand,
the way that the crotch is on the chin is not
something I’m seeing in any professional situation. Rhett:
Uh-huh, yeah. Link: At the end,
I’m looking for the slam, there’s no slam,
there’s just a drop and a step over,
which, I mean, I might give one, two
style points for that. – Rhett: Mm-hmm.
– Link: I’m looking at
a nice, even four… – Okay.
– …out of ten for Randy for that one. Feels pretty fair. Stevie:
Okay, guys, for this round, I’m gonna give you the name
of the move, but nothing else. – Cool.
– Nothing else? Does it look like
we’ve been needing instructions? Please perform a Gorilla Press
Into a Standing Moonsault. – Moonsault.
– Standing Moonsault. Gorilla Press I know. Gorilla Press
to a Standing Moonsault. Dandy, you hit this one first. All right, he’s down. Hoo-hoo! ( grunting ) Ooh! Whoo! Boo! Boo! Boo! Boom! Moon to Moonsault. Scene. Eat it, Randy! The thing that
I’ve learned is that most wrestling moves involve
putting you and your partner in a slightly
compromising situation. So we’re gonna start… in a tra– Hey,
don’t get any ideas. We’re gonna start…
( laughs ) in a traditional
wrestling pose. Like college wrestling,
you remember that, Paul! You remember those days
at Iowa University. Right? He’s a mute, you dummy. Okay, Paul, Gorilla Press
to full moon. Like that chick
on “Shape of Water.” Okay.
( grunting ) Okay.
One, one hand off. Something ripped. Another hand. Okay. ( grunting ) Lot of grunting. Oh! There’s stuffing
going everywhere. Thanks, Paul. All right, let’s see
Dandy’s Gorilla Press
into Standing Moonsault. All right,
draping him over, lifting him up. – Rhett: Whoa.
– Link: Boop! Oh, takes
a little work there. Rhett:
Okay, that makes sense to me. Link:
That’s showmanship. Nothing but showmanship there. – Okay.
– Rhett: And then… What? Oh. Whoa. Link:
What happened? – And then…
– Rhett: What’s going on there? What? That… That feels wrong. Let’s see what Randy did. Link:
in a prayer position? Oh, wow, oh, goodness. Like some torture. – Rhett: Oh, wow.
– Link: What? Link:
Did he rip his hand? Rhett:
Yeah, the hands come off. Link:
What the hands? – Rhett: Yep.
– Link: That’s horrifying. Rhett: Yeah, I mean, this is
just like a gorilla would do, – you know?
– Link: Oh, gosh. Rhett:
and this is very… wow. Link:
That is not
a realistic behavior of an opponent. Rhett:
There’s a lot of– whoa, now his head came off? – Link: Are you serious?
– Rhett: Yeah. It’s multi-faceted. Link:
You gotta give him
something for that. And then… and then… Link:
He’s just gonna lay down
with a leg up? Let’s see the real thing
from Apollo. Okay, yup, that’s… – Oh.
– Link: Oh, yeah. Rhett: And then… oh! Link:
Whoa, backflip! – Rhett: Okay.
– Link: Let’s start with Randy. There was no pulling off
of hands. Rhett:
I don’t see any of that. Link:
Nothing that happened in all of its violent glory, is anything I’m seeing
in Apollo’s performance. Zero out of ten. – Rhett: Okay, zero points?
– Link: Zero points. Rhett:
That doesn’t fare well for… Link:
I’ll give him one point for effort and violence. Rhett:
Okay, so Dandy
is in the right place at the right time
at the beginning doing the Gorilla Press,
but the butt-to-butt contact, I put Dandy at a ten and then, every time
he puts his butt
on the other guy’s butt, – I take points away.
– Link: Yep, as you should. Rhett:
I’m taking two points away
every time that happens, so I’m working
all the way down to a four. ( both laugh ) Link:
Yeah, he deserves that. I think he still
came out on top. He wins, 15 to 25. That means the new GMM
Wrestling Federation Heavyweight Champion
is Dandy Mandy. Whoo! Whoo-ooh! Yeah! Yeah, daddy! It’s too big for you, man. Thank you, Rhett and Link!
Whoo! Keep watching to see
Rhett and Link eat some insect
Rice Krispie poop. Get a GMM hat and T-shirt to go with that
championship belt, available at mythical.store.