Well we’re all very excited to have you here But I must warn you, the Garpax has eyes EVERYWHERE Be careful what you say and let your game do the talking Have no doubt, I’m as healthy as ever AND I shoot threes now There’s no reason we can’t form a superteam Is that…is that Dwyane Wade?
—here in Chicago— Oh Seven Hells It is. It is you! Who is that? Someone you know? Mario Chalmers We used to play together in Miami Oh great, here we go Hello Rio Nooooo You’re on the Bulls now? Oh that’s so WEIRD We was on a superteam together “The Big Four!” ‘Member those days, Dwyane? …no? But I can’t blame you for leaving really Twilight-a your career… bad knees, bad shoulders… maybe you can scrape together one last playoff run with… sorry what’s your name? Jimmy Butler Oh You DO look a lot like Michael Jordan Well it’s all very exciting We must be going now, I’m afraid Oh. Alright, um, well, if you need a point guard or whatever… or whatever…
just, send me a raven, yeah? just, send me a raven, yeah? We have Rondo Oh well, you never know with him He’s a bit… (crazy whistle) You’ll definitely need a veteran backup, no? We have plenty of depth but we’ll keep you in mind Cause…you know, we could be a superteam again! Bye Rio! YOU CAN YELL AT ME ALL YOU LIKE I DON’T MIND! Alright, well… guess I’ll head to Cleveland Gadzooks! Come in, come in! I came to say hello and welcome you to Houston Ah! Why thank you! And you must be the new scouting apprentice! I’ve been expecting you Uh…I’m your starting shooting guard… James Harden? All Realm shooting guard? James… James… you say… one moment please!
Aha! James Harden! The point guard. Forgive me. Shooting guard– I’ve been studying your game… it’s marvelous. Brilliant really! Oh, that’s very kind of you to say… So you…have a lot of books, I see This whole shelf is… inbound plays? Ah yes… baseline, sideline… I also keep iso plays in there somewhere for no good reason really And this shelf here, all books on the art of the pass Wow! Over there, that’s tempo plays, pick and rolls… you name it! Feel free to borrow them as you please, by the way Wow I bet you need whole new library just for all defensive plays Hmm? Defense…like…you know when the other team has the ball? …And they try to…you know…score… on… us? Oh no no no. None of that here It’s a waste of energy and it’s no fun I say half the defense… double the offense!